Stepparents & Biological parents

10 signs you are a smart stepmom

When I knew I would become a stepmom, I set out to get all the knowledge that I could on the subject. One of the greatest books I read was the “The Smart Stepmom” written by Laura Petherbridge.

Laura lists a couple of characteristics that make one smart stepmom. The journey of step motherhood is sometimes very bumpy with mountains to climb and valleys to conquer. However if you have a positive attitude and you are willing to learn your family dynamics, appropriately define your role and get the necessary support, you can thrive!

Here are the 10 signs of a smart stepmom for you to get started;

  1. A Smart Stepmom accepts that forming a healthy  stepfamily is a process  that requires education, patience and compassion.
  1. A Smart Stepmom recognizes that children have a fierce loyalty to a biological parent—this is true even if the parent is absent, abusive, manipulative, unstable or controlling.
  1. A Smart Stepmom grasps that kids who are hurting are likely to be cruel. She seeks ways to build a bridge with small gestures of love and compassion.
  1. A Smart Stepmom understands that her stepkids are likely to be confused, angry or grieving over the loss of the original family.
  1. A Smart Stepmom learns how to step back, set boundaries and let dad be the parent, even when he doesn’t know how or is unwilling.
  1. A Smart Stepmom allows dad to have time alone with his children.
  1. A Smart Stepmom realizes that it’s not a slap in the face when the stepchildren view her as, “My father’s wife.”
  1. A Smart Stepmom acknowledges, “The children already have a mother, and it’s not me!”
  1. A Smart Stepmom stands beside her husband  when the former spouse hurls insults, accusations and threats that are aimed at his manhood.
  1. A Smart Stepmom has faith that doing the right thing, even if it hurts, will ultimately bring peace to her home and soul.

Would you like to be a smart stepmom but have no clue where to begin? Contact Wendy for a private and confidential consultation and find out where you are going wrong and how you can get back on the path of success.

Send and email with the subject “consultation” to wendy@livinginstepafrica.com

 

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